trailblazin’ hearts and desires

[lately i’ve been having trouble writing in portuguese i dont’ really know why, maybe some kind of dysphoria, whatever, but i’m really not getting what i need from my latest notes, so i decided to give a shot to the colonizator’s language. it’s really not about proper english, so don’t even bother correcting me, it’s just a new attempt to have a good night’ sleep and to get things off my chest to be functional like a normal person.]

i hate my guts, but i enjoy the sorrow, which makes me love life sometimes.

i love to criticise ’cause it keeps me from looking to myself at the mirror. it’s nice to dream of a home at all, in a world where everybody eat each other’s reveries on a daily basis.

wish i could throw off my heart right into the train tracks. wish i could write a song that cleanses my soul.

wish i could write a song at all.

(at least, i’m trying to stop pretending it’s about you.)

04/23/2018